My first problem that surfaces in a lot of my relationships is that conflict that comes from my interest in having things done the right way. My primary interest in getting things done is efficient, effective and conservative. A lot of times I notice others don’t put the care and consideration that I would like to show respect for the other people in the home or other shared spaces.
My objective is to approach my daily tasks with improvement in mind. When I am choosing books to read I look for subjects that revolve around improving myself or a process. I am open and looking for better ways to improve results in daily activities. Even though I explain to people in my life of my interest in finding new ways to get things done, many people focus on the certainty I express with how I like things kept.
In my experience most people don’t think deeply about much of anything. When I come up with a way to do something it’s often overwhelming for others because every single task has a reason and an explanation behind it. I am not trying to be especially difficult but the attention to detail seems to label me as anal retentive and unreasonable. For some reason the details I focus on are calls trivial and dismissed as wastes of time.
I’m not saying that I’m always right. I don’t expect others to follow my ideas although it is my position that if someone else knows a better way I would like to know it and most of the people I know and have in my life don’t have a better way. People don’t spend time working on getting better. It seems that people are just trying to get by or through the challenges in front of them.
In theory and conversation, having a caring and concerned demeanor is attractive to people in conversation or when I am doing something on someone else’s behalf but when people get close enough to me to be part of my process they realize the way I do things has a learning curve. There comes a time when the lack of appreciation and stamina for paying attention to the process of the relationship gets strained from something that must feel like pressure.